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What a pilot needs to do to make her woman happy?
Flying - General
Written by Capt Lim   
Saturday, 22 February 2014 03:23

7 steps to a great relationship - advice for you
 
Dear Capt Lim

I have a question. I read your article about what a pilot needs to do to make his woman happy and show her appreciation for the hard family life - take her with him on flight sometimes, encourage her to take travelling perks to visit friends’ family or be in touch every day with a web cam at the end of the day. Make sure basically that even though he may want to do his thing, he still has to make time for her.

I dated a pilot for 4 years. He used to do his thing first, then if time was left, he would call me, usually via phone (no web cam), but by then he was too tired to engage in any meaningful conversation. Sometimes he would not even bother calling and would do so the following day as if it was nothing.

The most important thing I want to ask is: is it normal for a pilot to visit family and friends on his days off at regular monthly intervals, leaving me in the U.K. where we live, alone for 17 days in a row? (6 working away, 5 days off spent in his country doing his hobbies, 6 working away = 17 before he finally comes home to me in the UK).

When he was away on days off he would also be hard to get hold of. His phone would be out of credit or battery or he didn't hear. This would happen every month. The damage on us was huge. I’d like to know if this is normal and whether I was entitled to complain.

Thanks

Victoria

Hi Victoria,

It appears that your pilot boyfriend is giving you excuses for not being able to communicate more often. Unless you can get a frank answer from him, I believe it is going to be the same in the future as well.

If your relationship is a close one, not communicating for 17 days in a stretch is not a very healthy one even if he is busy flying or having to visit his own family or friends. To me, that is not very normal if he really cares about his relationship with you.

Pilots are just like any human – admittedly, with more opportunities to mix with the opposite sex in the course of their work. Nevertheless, if the relationship is a strong one, you have to trust each other more than being suspicious all the time.

I am not a counselling expert on relationship amongst pilots in the aviation industry and I would suggest that you seek more advice from a professional or close friends on this aspect.


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